Beauty, Tragedy, and the In-Between

Written on November 27th, 2020
It was only just last week I was on my telehealth appointment with my mental care provider. I was telling her how well everything was going. My body finally got used to my medications’ side effects. I was feeling financially stable again. I had a good work-to-personal life routine. Then, BOOM, I’m unemployed again. The service industry was slowly recovering, but then hit hard…again. That’s exactly how I feel too.

My bartending gig gave me a purpose to get out of bed and maintain a routine. It allowed me to safely socialize with others. I’m devastated that that’s being taken away from me again, and I have to re-file for unemployment. 

November 30th, 2020
This change seemed to trigger and exasperate my depression and anxiety. I didn’t leave my room for almost three days. I wasn’t eating well. I wasn’t taking care of my body or mind. I was isolating myself from the world, and not in a healthy, “socially distanced” way. I felt lost and stuck. I felt the dread washing over me. I thought, “I am going to be so lonely and bored all winter… can my mental health handle this?”

On this day I decided I didn’t want to give in to the darkness. I didn’t want to be a victim of my mind. Instead of viewing this as an unfortunate event, I viewed it as a challenge to learn and grow from. I wanted to honor myself and my potential and try.

I came up with a challenge for myself. This is what I did for 30 days to improve my mental, emotional, and physical health:

MORNING ROUTINE:

-wake up at 8 am every day

-tidy my space and make my bed so I wouldn’t crawl back in to scroll on my phone

-journal and write my intentions for the day ahead and a list of things I am grateful for

-10 minutes of yoga

-10 minutes for light exercise

-10 minutes of meditation

NIGHT ROUTINE:

-journal and reflect on my day

-10 minutes of yoga

-avoid my phone before sleep

OTHER PRACTICES

-cut back on alcohol and fast food

-no complaining or negative self-talk allowed

-avoid heat/styling on my hair

-applying castor oil on my brows and eyelashes

Present Day
Here’s what changed for me:

Daily meditation greatly improved my feelings of anxiety and depression. It gave me a sense of clarity and motivation. I used the app “Headspace.” The 30-day course was called “Sadness.”

Self-reflecting in my journal cleared space in my heart and mind. The lists of gratitude helped me find joy in the little things and appreciate the bigger picture. I got to know more about myself and felt a deeper connection with who I am.

The 30 days of yoga and exercise helped me both physically and mentally. Physically- I was improving my flexibility, strength, and growing my muscles. Mentally- It improved my focus, gave me energy, and helped me regain confidence. I used “The 30 Day Morning Yoga Challenge,” on Youtube by “Yoga With Kassandra.” I did 100 bridges for my exercise. For my night yoga, I stretched alone and did whatever felt good for me.

Avoiding heat and styling greatly improved the quality of my hair, which also helped with my confidence.

The castor oil encouraged eyelash and brow growth!

I’m proud of myself for sticking to these good habits. It was a struggle at first. And although the changes were small, they helped me build a stronger and more stable foundation for myself. I look forward to coming up with more challenges and continuing my journey of growth.

If you’re going through a tough time or you feel stuck in a rut, any small improvement to your daily routine will help you. Even if it’s just writing down 3 things that you are grateful for, I promise you’ll see some change. And that change will encourage more change. It’s a good cycle to be in. It’s easy to get caught up in a negative experience and slide into a pit. It’s just as possible to pull yourself out of there. You just need the tools and the know-how. 

Please reach out if you’re curious about this 30-Day Challenge, or if you’d like help coming up with one of your own!

Take Care, 

Emily.